Tuesday, August 10, 2010

As Tall As Infants




I can't, my feeling won't let me and I'm stuck. I can't think and I can't let anything out.

I have start school tomorrow, I had to do 4 assignments for ap art but I haven't done any, I had to read three books but I haven't read any. I can't think. My stomach is a giant knot and my intestines work as a rope tying everything together. Each drip of saliva is caught in a ball that becomes harder to swallow each time It reappears in my mouth. There is no headache but there is a void waiting to be filled with stress and thoughts of disappointment. I climb only to find there is nothing at the top. At times like these the smart say tears are solutions but the dumb listen to their music waiting for a song to fulfill whatever is missing. Like a song can really make you feel new again. I wish and like to believe but it's only a tool to make the hole bigger and every slow song that passes by tightens the knot harder.

This all is not because of school. Haha school is a joke, I'm not stressed or anything of the sort because of school. I feel this way because of the things that happen in life. Today was an amazing day I spent it with people I adore, most importantly you. I felt invincible and refreshed but once I arrived home I waited. I truly do feel amazing inside but I feel like I missed something important. I wish I could tell you but it's late. You have things to do I need to catch up with reality. Sorry i didn't say anything. I really wanted to say anything but I had nothing to say, like always your true and I'm just an idiot haha. What I said I meant and I don't take back. You've known me, I feel like I've changed but it's always up to someone else to let you know if that is true.



It sucks that I have to step back into life again it was fun but this knot is not working out. You shine so bright and I'm as dull as anyone else haha.

I gotta get back to work

Night

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